单老师高中英语写作指导课件.ppt

高考英语书面表达特训,单俊刚,2010.12.12,一、弄清一个概念,1. 优秀英语作文的标准是什么？,极优档（30分）（很少） 上 档（18-29分） 一优秀（2629） 要点全面，紧扣主题，观点表达充分，能有效使用连接成分，具备较强的书面表达能力。语言小错（拼写，标点）少于四个，不能有一处大错。 二良好（22-25） 要点全面紧扣主题，观点表达较充分，语言有少量错误，（大错不超过三个。）但基本不影响意思表达。 三一般（1821） 要点全面，紧扣主题。语言表达基本充分，语言错误影响部分意思的表达，但多数句子基本正确。,说明：作文要达到及格线（18分）以上，必须要点全。也就是说，如果缺要点最多只能得17分。但又同时规定，对于语言表达特别好的作文可以突破这个限制，划入良好档，但最多不得超过22分。关于时态，每出现一处时态错误，均以大错论处。,下 档（017分） 四 较差（13-17） 能够写出基本要点，行文不连贯，语言错误较多，半数句子基本正确 五差(6-12) 能够写出部分要点，能够写出部分与内容相关的可读句。 六很差（0-5） 只能写出与内容相关的词语，没有有效信息，抄写其他文章或只写出部分单词。,一、弄清一个概念,1. 优秀英语作文的标准是什么？,补充说明： 1. 关于大错小错问题： 小错：单词拼写，冠词，大小写，标点符号错误。 大错：搭配错误，词语用错，（介词，名词，动词，形容词副词，主谓一致，非谓语动词，句式结构） 2. 字数少于120，减去2分。 3. 书写差，减去2分，如影响交际，将分数降低一个档次。,总结：什么样的作文是一篇好作文,无遗漏信息点，即要点全面 篇章条理清晰：分段和过渡词 句式复杂多样 地道的高级词汇和恰当的词组,接下来，我们具体感知一下优秀作文的要素。,二、感知典型范例,二、感知典型范例,词汇层面1,adj. 聪明的、脑筋好的 clever wise smart bright intelligent,二、感知典型范例,词汇层面2,adj.令人惊奇的 surprising amazing astonishing,他昨天下午来的。 1. He came here yesterday afternoon. 2. He didnt come here until yesterday afternoon. 3. Not until yesterday afternoon did he come here. 4. It was yesterday afternoon that he came here.,二、感知典型范例,句型层面1,令她吃惊的是，小女孩知道这么多事情。 1. He is surprised that the little girl knows so many things. 2. To his surprise , the little girl knows so many things. 3. What surprises him is that the little girl knows so many things.,二、感知典型范例,句型层面2,二、感知典型范例,段落层面1,This village is very small. It has nearly 100 families and about 500 people. It used to be very poor. It has changed a lot since 1978 . People here are richer than before. Now it is taking on a new look.,This village is very small，which has nearly 100 families and about 500 people. It used to be very poor. However, it has changed a lot since 1978 . People here are leading a richer and happier life than before. Now it is taking on a new look.,二、感知典型范例,段落层面2,I think, for us children, we should often go home and stay together with our parents though we are busy. Our society should organize all kinds of activities for the seniors to help them live happily. We can build a harmonious society only when all of us care for the aged.,As far as I am concerned, for us children, we should often go home and stay together with our parents however busy we are. Whats more, our society should organize all kinds of activities for the seniors to help them live a happy life. Only when all of us care for the aged can we build a harmonious society,二、感知典型范例,篇章层面1,卷面不整洁; 涂改较多;语言错误多;层次不清;得11分,二、感知典型范例,篇章层面2,字数不够或未能传达读者任何信息，不得分。,书写对比鲜明,poor,篇章层面3,excellent,三、阅卷老师忠告,1.网上阅卷对卷面要求提高。 阅卷教师看电脑屏评分，屏幕上视觉比纸上印象更突出，每行高度约为直线格的2/3的作文视觉效果最佳，此类作文错误少并用有效连接成分就能高分。 2.中等水平学生容易成为最吃亏学生群。 高考阅卷特点，决定了阅卷时间短、速度快、赋分中庸。两极的考生优劣分明，容易赋分，而中等学生，如果出现书写潦草或低级错误容易出现得分趋低情况，成为最吃亏的一个群体。 3.书面表达是提高平均分最大的潜力股。 平均分：15分 峰值：1719分 提升空间巨大,四、明确写作步骤,四、明确写作步骤,五、培养几种技能,Simple sentence(简单句): Hearing the news, he was happy.,B) Compound sentence A（并列句）: He gave me a book but I forgot to bring it back home.,C) Compound sentence B（复合句）: What he is doing has nothing to do with me.,“规范的英语句子”就是我们经常讲的三种句子：,1.学会使用规范的英语句子,Here are 3 ways to make sentences:,I.巧妙运用短语，写出规范的简单句：,1)借助名词短语做同位语,如：李立，男，19岁，1991年生；籍贯：广东。,Li Li, a boy of 19, was born in Guangdong in 1991.,2)借助介词短语做定语,如：李飞, 男，10岁，棕色短发，穿白色茄克。,Li Fei is a ten-year-old boy with short brown hair and in a white jacket.,如：有了Tom的帮助，我们很快就找到了他们的村子。,With the help of Tom, we soon found their village.,4)借助非谓语动词短语做定语或状语,如：他们站在大树下，等待着总统的到来。,They were standing under the big tree, waiting for the president. Standing under the big tree, they were waiting for the President.,3)借助介词短语做状语,II. 巧用连接词，写出规范的并列句：,如：他给我很多钱，我不要。,I was just walking down the street corner when I saw you.,如：我刚走到拐角处，就见到你了。,He gave me a lot of money but I refused.,III. 用好从句和引导词写出规范的复合句：,1) 名词性从句,如：老师生气。原因：王力迟到。,That Wang Li came late to school made the teacher very angry.,2) 定语从句,如：中国,地处亚洲东部；特点：地大物博、人口众多。,China, which lies in the east of Asia, is a great country with a large area and population as well as rich natural resources.,I was deeply moved by this, because I know Lei Feng is still living in our hearts.,3) 状语从句,如：雷锋还活在我们心中，我深受感动。,2、灵活运用九种句式,有意识的将下列句式结构运用到作文中去，可以迅速地让我们的作文靓起来。重要的是我们要学会如何灵活的变通、巧妙地运用到考试作文中去。,1. People grow rice in the south of China. Rice is grown in the south of China. 2. They have printed one and a half million copies of the dictionary since 1986. One and a half million copies of the dictionary have been printed since 1986.,一、主动句与被动句的互换。,二、将陈述句改为倒装句。,I could hardly understand the importance of English at that time. Hardly could I understand the importance of English at that time. 2. We did not realize our mistakes until at that time. Not until at that time did we realize our mistakes.,三、将简单句改为强调句,Smoking did great harm to his health. It was smoking that did great harm to his health. 2. Our money is earned through hard work by our parents. It is through hard work that our money is earned by our parents. 3. He went there yesterday. He did go there yesterday.,四、将两个简单句合并为并列句,1.You can do it. I can do it. One of us must do it. you I must do it. 2.I want to buy this bike. I dont have enough money. I want to buy this bike, I dont have enough money.,Either,or,but,五、将两个简单句合并为复合句,1. 同位语和同位语从句 Liu Xiang is an excellent athlete. He won the first prize in Mens 110 Hurdle Race in the 2004 Olympic Games. _, _, won the first prize in Mens 110 Hurdle Race in the 2004 Olympic Games. 2) The word is true. The president will give our school a speech. _ is true _ the president will give our school a speech.,Liu Xiang,an excellent athlete,It,that,2. 定语从句 1) The 2008 Olympic Games will be held in Beijing, and its slogan is One World, One Dream, The 2008 Olympic Games, _ _ 2) In my opinion, the Great Wall and the Summer Palace are well worth visiting. In my opinion, the Great Wall and the Summer Palace _ 3) Yesterday, we went to the East Gate, and we bought a lot of clothes. Yesterday, we went to the East Gate, _ _,One Dream, will be held in Beijing.,are the two places which are well worth visiting.,where we bought a,Whose slogan is One World,lot of clothes.,3. 主语从句 1) His wonderful performance on the stage impressed me. most was his wonderful performance on the stage. 2) It satisfied me. The dining hall provides us with a large variety of kinds of dishes. the dining hall provides us with a large variety of kinds of dishes. 3) I learned from the story that as long as we have patience, confidence and perseverance, we can realize our dreams. as long as we have patience, confidence and perseverance, we can realize our dreams.,What impressed me,What satisfied me is that,What I have learnt from the story is that,推荐句型,What surprises astonished satisfied impressed me is that What I would like to suggest advise put forward is that What matters most is that What I learnconclude from the story is that,4. 表语从句 推荐句型： is no longer what it used to be. 1) 我的家乡不再像以前那样了。 My hometown is no longer what it used to be. 2) 他不再是以前那样了。 He is no longer what he used to be.,5. 状语从句 结果、程度 sothat ; such that 让步 no matter how what when where. =whatever, however, whenever, wherever 时间 was doingwhen , as soon as, the moment, the next time, every time,1)不管前面有多少困难，我们都要学会独立的克服他们。 _ _, we should learn to overcome them independently. 2) 我正沿着马路走，突然我听到有人叫我。 I _ along the road _ suddenly I heard my name called.,No matter how many difficulties there,was walking,when,are ahead of us,六、将两个简单句合并为一个由which引导的非限制性定语从句,1. Recently many students spend their money on unnecessary things. Different people have different opinions about it. Recently many students spend their money on unnecessary things, about different people have different opinions. 2. Many boys learn to smoke. It does harm to their health. Many boys learn to smoke, _ _,which,which does harm to,their health.,七、it 作形式主语或形式宾语句型,1. You pretend to know what you dont know. Its no good. Its no good pretending to know what you dont know. 2. It is easy to get on with Pam. I find. I find it easy to get on with Pam.,八、分词结构代替状语从句,If you work harder, you will do better in the exam next time. _, you will do better in the exam next time. 2. Because my friend was frightened of losing his job, he said nothing to the police. _, my friend said nothing to the police.,Working hard,Frightened of losing his job,九、 将状语从句或并列句中的其中一个分句变成with 引导的短语或者复合结构。,With + 宾语+ adj./ adv./ 介词短语/ to dodoingdone 常用句型 with a population of. with a total area of with a long history of years,1) 这个地区占地2000平方千米，人口10万。 This area covers an area of 2000 square kilometers, _ 2)我们学校周围种了很多花，吸引了大量的学生来参观。 _, it attracts a large number of people. 3) 我们学校是一所有100多年历史的名校。 Our school is a famous one _ _,with a population of 100,000.,With many flowers surrounding our school,with a history of over 100 years.,4）没有做完作业，这个小孩不敢去上学。 _, the boy dared not go to school. 5) 这两个男人早早就睡了，蜡烛烧了一晚上。 The two men went to bed early, _ _. 6) 他睡觉的时候嘴巴张得大大的。 He sleep _.,with candles burning a night long,With homework not finished,with his mouth wide open,六、牢记典型模板,(一) 观点论证型 结构模板1 (1)It is well known that 论点. (2)The truth is deep and profound./The truth of it is self-evident. (3) 正确性表现. (4)总结论点. (5)Many remarkable factors/reasons contribute to this argument. (6)First of all, 论据一. (7)Whats more/Moreover, 论据二. (8)For example, 支持论据二的事例. In addition/Besides, 论据三. (10)All mentioned above tell us that 重申观点. (11)Therefore, there is no denying that 正确态度或做法. (12)In short, 总结全文.,结构模板2 (1)论点, which has been generally accepted. (2) 论点含义. (3)The truth of it is deep and profound. (4)There are numerous examples supporting this argument. /Many remarkable examples contribute to this argument. (5)A case in point is 例证一. (6)This is close to suggest例证一的道理. (7)For another example, 例证二. (8)Moreover, 例证三. (9)judging from the evidence offered, we might safely draw the conclusion that重申观点. But one thing we have to notice is 需要注意的问题. (11)In short, 总结全文.,(二) 问题解决型 结构模板1 (1)Nowadays, it is generally accepted that 总述问题. (2)表现一. (3)表现二. (4)There are many reasons accounting for 该问题./Special attention should be paid to the fact that该问题 is bringing great damage. (5)On the one hand/for one thing, 原因一/危害一. (6)On the other hand/For another, 原因二/危害二. (7)Therefore, it is high time that 解决该问题. (8)Many a way can be adopted to解决该问题. /Many a factor plays an important role in解决该问题. (9)Firstly/First of all, 方法一/因素一. (10)Secondly/In addition, 方法二/因素二. (11)Thirdly/Besides/Moreover, 方法三/因素三. (12)Only through these ways/Only in this way 该问题才能够解决.,结构模板2 (1)Recently, there has been a discussion about总述该问题. / Nowadays, it has become a common phenomenon总述该问题. (2) 危害一/原因一 . Additionally , 危害二/原因二 . (4)Therefore, it is high time that解决该问题. (5)The following ways can be adopted to解决该问题. /Some effective measures have been taken to解决该问题. /Many a factor plays an important role in解决该问题. (6)Firstly/First of all, 方法一/因素一. (7)Secondly/In addition, 方法二/因素二. (8)Thirdly/Besides/Moreover, 方法三/因素三. (9)Only through these ways/Only in this way该问题才能够解决. (10)There is no doubt that解决该问题的意义. (11)As for me, 我的建议或看法. (12) 总结观点.,(三) 现象解释型 结构模板1 (1)From the chart/graph/table/picture, we clearly learn that 总述社会现象/事实, which has aroused great/common concern. (2)What impresses us most is 图表中重点数据. (3)There are many reasons accounting for 现象或变化. (4)First of all/To begin with, 原因一. (5)what is more/Moreover, 原因二. (6)进一步说明原因二.,(7) In addition/Besides, 原因三 . (8)Therefore/As a result, 总结原因导致的结果. (9)As to me/As far as I am concerned, 我的观点. (10)For one thing/On the one hand, 影响一/问题一. (11) For another/On the other hand, 影响二/问题二. Thus/In brief/To conclude, 总结观点.,结构模板2 (1)As is shown/described/depicted in the cartoon/picture, 图表内容概括(2)In the first picture, 描述图表一内容(如果是一个图表，则左或上半部分)(3) As is shown in the second drawing/following pictures, 描述图表二内容(如果是二个图表，则或右或下半部分)(4)It is safe to draw the conclusion that揭示寓意(或主题句，回应主题但不是主题句的重复)(描述图表段) (5)There are many reasons responsible for this phenomenon/case/instance and the following are the typical,ones. (6)The first reason is that 理由一(7)The second reason is that理由二(8)The third mason is that/A case in point is that/The typical example is that 理由三(说明原因段) (9)In order to improve the situation/To sum up the above argument/Confronted with such an issue/a problem, we should find several solutions to it/need to take sox positive measures. (10)On the one hand/For one thing we should方法建议一(11)On the other hand/For another, 方法建议二(12)Therefore/Thus/Only in this way, can总结句 (个人观点段),模板示例 Study the following pictures carefully and write an essay of about 150 words. Your essay should cover all the information provided and meet the requirement below: 1. Interpret the following pictures. 2. Give your reasons to this phenomenon.,(1)As is shown in the picture, the situation of college students employment is worsening, as it is hard for them to be accepted by an employer upon graduation. (2) In the two bar pictures we can see that the number of both college graduates and post graduates increased from 1990 to 2001. (3)As is shown in the following pictures, nearly 50,000, or 10% of college graduates in the city become jobless in the year 2001. (4)It is safe to draw the conclusion that college students, once the “God favored few“, are now in their hard times. (5)There are many reasons responsible for this phenomenon and the following are the typical ones. (6)The first reason is that the citys economic structure is changing so fast that many college graduates are not ready for the challenge. (7) The second reason is that type of economy has been,changed to the knowledge economy that features high and new technologies and modern management. The requirement to graduates is more and more high. (8)The third reason is that many universities failed to change their education plans to meet the societys needs, so that they will not be able to produce students fully prepared. As a result, it is not hard to see that many students cannot find a job that matches their majors. (9)In order to improve the situation, we should find several solutions to it. (10) For one thing, the unemployment rate will continue to fall as more and more graduates choose to further their education. (11)For another, college graduates should be encouraged to take the post which may not matches their majors and keep learning in the process of practice. (12) Only in this way, can college students find job opportunities in the society.,(四) 对比选择型 结构模板1 (1)When it comes to 事物/问题, there is no complete agreement among people. (2)Some people take it for granted that 一种观点. (3)However, others maintain that 另一种观点. (4)Those people who hold the former opinion believe 观点一理由一. (5)In a addition, 观点一理由二. (6)therefore 总结观点一.,(7)However, still others advocate the latter opinion because they hold 观点二理由一. (8)Besides, they argue that 观点二理由二. (9)So, 总结观点二. (10)Weighing up these two arguments, 我的看法. (11)For one thing, 个人看法的依据一. (12)for another, 个人看法的依据二. (13)Taking above-mentioned factors into consideration, we/ I may reasonably conclude that 重申观点.,结构模板2 (1)Different people have different views on 看法/问题. (2)Some prefer 一种看法/观点. (3)Others tend to 另一种看法/观点. (4)As to me, I agree to the first/second opinion. (5)Of course, 我不赞同观点的合理性. (6)For example, 支持其合理性的例子. (7)But in my opinion, 我不赞同观点的不足. (8)The following reasons can account for my argument. (9)Firstly, 支持观点的理由一. (10)A good example to illustrate is支持理由一的例子. (11)In addition/Moreover/Whats more, 支持观点的理由二. (12)To conclude/From the foregoing, 重申观点.,结构模板3 (1)When asked about/When it comes to 事物/问题, different people will offer different opinions. (2)Some people take it for granted that 观点一 . (3)In their opinion, 观点一的理由一. (4)Besides, 观点一的理由二 . (5)However, others hold 观点二 . (6)They maintain 观点二理由一. (7)And 观点二理由二. (8)Weighing up these two arguments, 我的观点. (9)For one thing/On the one hand, 理由一. (10)For another/On the other hand, 理由二. (11)For instance, as stated above, 总结全文.,(五) 漫画作文 结构模板1 (1)It is shown/depicted/described in the picture that 图表内容总括. (2)进一步阐述图表内容. (3)As is symbolically revealed in the pictures, 折射生活中的意义. (4)We can say that/We may draw/safely come to a conclusion that/We can see clearly that 对寓意进一步引申和归纳. (描述图表段) (5)There are many examples found to prove that 主题句. (6)Take as a typical example./The first example is that 阐述例子一(可进一步阐述). (7)The second example is that/In addition/Here is a counterexample. /Opposite case in point is that /On the contrary 第二个例子(或举一反面例子). (8)Therefore, 段落总结句. (举例说明段),(9)In order to improve the situation/To sum up the above argument/Confronted with such an issue/a problem, we should find several solutions to it/need to take some positive measures. (10)On the one hand/For one thing 方法/建议一. (11)On the other hand/For another, 方法/建议二. (12)Therefore/Thus/Only in this way, can 总结句. (个人观点段) 模板示例 Write an essay of 150 words based on the following drawing. In your essay, you should 1) describe the drawing briefly, 2) explain its intended meaning, and then 3) give your comments.,(1)It is shown in the picture that two crippled men with one of their legs bound together and one supporting the other are heading forward to see the world. (2)They had left their crutches behind. (3)As is symbolically revealed in the pictures, teamwork is crucial to achieve a goal, or if any, two heads are better than one. (4)We may draw a conclusion that the co-work and joint efforts is very important for success. (5)There are many examples found to prove that the importance of the co-work and joint efforts. (6)The first example is that in the case of